Cautiously Optimistic

I had another appointment with the OB yesterday and I am starting to get a little optimistic about this pregnancy. I had a little black-out moment at work when I stood up so I called my OB. Since I had an appointment that day already scheduled, he just told me to come in so he could see how I was doing. They did an u/s and both babies looked very good. They were moving and waving and had good heartbeats. He could also see the little sacs of their stomachs (which I guess is some milestone). Baby A measured 17w and Baby B measured 16w3d, so things are right on track! My blood pressure was high and he thinks I am a little dehydrated. So he sent me home and told me to relax and drink water. I did finally gain some weight this week. So that's basically it. I go back in another 2 weeks for a quick ultrasound and then my anatomy scan is scheduled for November 14th.

I am starting to feel them move more and more. My uterus is measuring 6 weeks ahead so it looks/feels like I am 23 weeks pregnant. I personally just think I look like my fat is pushed out but people at work and other places are stopping me and asking me how far along I am, so I guess I do look pregnant. So far the funniest moments are when they will both be still and one will move and suddenly the other starts to move like crazy. I think they like to wake each other up and have little cage fights.

We just found out we will be providing respite care for Baby K from November 6-9th. I'm excited to see her again and I am sure she has changed and grown a lot in a month!

Finally, good appointment! Goodbye to Baby K :(

I saw the OB yesterday afternoon and all is well! My bleeding, while still present, is starting to slow down quite a bit. Both babies were moving and even trying to head butt each other. Apparently sibling rivalry starts early. Baby A was measuring almost 15 weeks and Baby B was just 5 days behind. They aren't worried about B as much because the sac is starting to expand and he/she has move room to move around. It was my first appointment that didn't have a lot of drama and emotion associated with it. It felt so good! My ute is measuring almost 20 weeks! So I look and feel very pregnant. I even felt some movement over the last several days. It's a strange, but wonderful feeling. It's like they are saying "hello mommy... we are hereeeeee!". And they really like Coke Slurpees too...by the way.

The doctor told me I need to start relaxing and work on enjoying being pregnant. I am still having lots of nausea and dizziness, especially in the evening. And I haven't been able to eat. I try really hard but I am down 16 pounds since we did our IVF and have lost 5 pounds in the last 12 days. He said he really isn't worried about me gaining a ton of weight right now, but I need to maintain. So at the suggestion of my wonderful friends I went down and bought myself some "Muscle Milk" today. It is a shake that contains 25g of protein and will give me some nutrients. I didn't love drinking it, but it is better than eating meat!

Today is our last day with Baby K. She is transitioning to her new home at 330pm. I am really sad to see her go, but it was the right decision for all of us. After talking with the social workers we feel like the situation wasn't one we were comfortable with and I just don't have the emotional stability to handle all of this for another 2 years, on top of being pregnant and having newborn twins. We are still going to have contact with her and in fact we are going to babysit for a weekend in November. So we are saying goodbye, but not goodbye forever.

Thanks to all my friends who have been so supportive throughout all these ups and downs. I couldn't have made it this far without you. I know this is far from over and I still have a long way to go, but it really helps just to know I am not alone. Love you all!